And so, all good things must come to an end one way or another sadly enough. Tis the end of this half of the show, we must move on now. But for this weeks finale, we’re going to spice things up and talk to the underdog of the class to answer a few questions. Please welcome PATRICK RONANNN
Patrick: ”Nice to be here-”
Narrator: “No one cares about what you think we’re the ones asking the questions here now shut up and answer the questions!”
Narrator: “Aw did I hurt the little babies feelings, did the mean ol’ narrator guy make you not want to answer some simple <redacted> questions because he such a meanie head?”
Patrick: “No..I’m still gonna answer.”
Narrator: “Okay goodie, now for our first question, how do you feel about the fact that you’ve had as many days off in the past school week that you’ve had on?”
Patrick: “Well I think that it was nice to have the days off; but I also felt like it was ba-”
Narrator: “Hey stay on topic, moving onto the next question. What exactly did you do these pst two weeks, and don’t go off topic like you just did or you’re going off the air. Got it?”
Patrick: “Yeah I guess, so what happened was last Monday we started on the ideas of MRAM, LRAM, and RRAM and Cresswell told us that the storms probably wouldn’t be that bad and they would pass easily. But then the next 3 days were fraught with horrible weather that was absolutely undrivable and when school finally started back up, we just had nothing we could do but review and move on to the 2nd lesson of the section and that pretty much finished the week. The second week was better though, we only had two days off. But we had to deal with a quiz that week, but I actually did feel confident that it was bett-”
Narrator: “Kid, go <redacted> yourself you went off topic get out of here.”
Patrick: “Hey you <redacted> why don’t you go do what you said and <redacted> yourself!”
Narrator: “Kid get away from my neck stop stop stopppppp--!!!!”
We are so sorry we had to cut that interview short, but sadly there was a circuit break and we can’t reconnect. Have a nice night and we will move onto regularly scheduled programming.
Heyyyyyyyyy whatup thanks for tuning in for the next big episode of AP CALCULUSSSSSSSSSS. Now we're sorry but there have been multiple network errors and complaints for torture child labor and abuse and a whole string of other charges of worker safety violations, tax evasion, and jaywalking. But all of that's behind this show now and we're back on. Heck YEAH!
Now what happens is I’m just going to go through this week as calmly and smoothly as possible, although they definitely aren’t threatening to kill me if ratings aren’t as high as they would like them to be after this long mid-seasonal hiatus
Now to give you a quick rundown of the situation so far. Our young contestants had finished up optimization and started a concept known as related rates which is very very similar to optimization, but slightly easier. But sadly for our heroes, the break was not good enough for Mr. Cresswell told them of a foreboding vision, that they would have a unit test on the day of January 5th of 2017.
And so the time before that Cresswell prepared them giving them reviews and help and videos, but sadly the test day did have to come. And it was a very brutal and cruel extravaganza; as such, the students now lie in wait and suspense for the grades they receive on the test. WHo will pass? Who will fail? And will anyone ever like optimization and related rates? These are all questions that will be answered in time on AP CALCULUSSSSSS
Hello again and welcome to AP Calculus. Our previous narrator is not appearing and currently we have no idea of his whereabouts, any tips or sightings would be helpful but that's besides the point, the point is that I will be taking over the narratorial duties of him.
As he stated last Sunday, the contestants did indeed have a test that many people felt like they did well on and moved on from the topics of curve sketching and mean values to more devilish ideas such as optimization.
Now optimization is one of the processes in which calculus is useful as we use advanced algebraic manipulations to find out solutions such as the most optimal size of an oil canister to maximizing rectangles. But the only downside, it is very difficult to see and observe and as such takes a very long time to do and often incorrectly done.
And of course, as boring as it may be. That is all our contestants did under the watchful eye of Cresswell. But by the end of the week he found them suitably ready for a quiz over it, sadly they were not so Mr Cresswell simply had to extend the test time to the next monday. Of course you cannot blame the students, these concepts they are discussing are very hard.
And that's it for this weeks edition of AP calculus, tune in next time for a more exciting episode
Wow has this first week been exciting. These contestants, straight off of both the joy of Thanksgiving and the stress of exams. Are getting right back to the grindstone learning more and more about this mysterious concept of of the bindings between not only F(x) and its derivative, but also the surprise connections to the second derivative too through an activity that proved to be brutal and uncompletable for some of our varied contestants.
That was just the first day though, for on the second day Mr. Cresswell took pity on the students and threw them a bone at going over the previous assignment with them. This was kind of Mr. Cresswell before giving them an assignment that tested their endurance on the subject and sent them off to complete what he felt they must, with the promise of more time tomorrow and a relieving activity
Of course Cresswell was true to his word and he gave the students time to work on the day of Wednesday with only a smaller activity of attempting to find out if a curve sketch was true or false. But therein comes the question of what will happen when this show is done as is my job as a narrator, I will have no purpose. With no purpose how can I survive, why do I exist if I do nothing, if I even exist. Where does my existence lie.
Oh, sorry, I promised myself no more existential monologues on camera after it pushed some of the original fans away. Just as I push all of my problems away into alcohol and indescribably horrific acts of hedonism and senseless anger, it's the only escape for me for I don't want to remember, my end is near. The end of my reason, my purpose, my existence..
Crap sorry again, let’s move onto the next day thursday. Now on Thursday our contestants have been moved into not just reading graphs, but creating them themselves from functions. There is no point, anymore. Why am I even narrating, why does it matter, I won’t even be able to enjoy it at all later. I might as well just get this all over with. On Friday they just did more practice on curve sketching and were told they would have a quiz on the next Monday let me go home now I need to cry *drops mic and sprints off*
Well we gotta hit the ground running would be the best way to describe. We’re back yet again for another season of AP Calculus with our host Mr. Zachery Cresswell. Now while in last season had some exciting moments and we have had to disqualify a few contestents. Who will fail next, who will crack under the pressure, and will we find out the meaning of life. We don’t know any of that, but you viewers can if you tune in every sunday at 9 PM Eastern Pacific time to listen to a beautiful narration of this breathtaking spectacle with this imaginary wonderful voice that doesn’t actually have a voice because I’m just text on a screen...
Wow...that thought is frankly very horrifying. Do I really exist? Is this narrator nothing, or maybe this narrator is everything as every person has a different view, a different reality of who this narrator is, but who am I to myself as voice, what is my meaning…
Anywho, while I face these existential problems, I’ll leave you to end this ad and move onto the greener pastures and excitement of AP CALCULUS
You know Mr. Cresswell, usually I would begin these with some snarky remark about the school day or super cool mathematics, bt today I’m going to begin with a sorry. I know that I’ve been very passive agressive in these posts and acting like donkey butt, but I really do honestly like this class even if I don’t understand half the stuff we’re learning, and you have honestly been probably the best math teacher I’ve ever had through my entire school career primary and secondary.) Heck, I probably wouldn’t have even tried to take this class after I was bumped out at the beginning of the year if you hadn’t been the teacher because you are a great teacher. You have always been willing to not just help me, but also other student during your break time and you don’t just try to make us read to understand. You actually involve us in the learning through your labs and examples. And thank you for being willing to use your prep time to go over and let me retake my quizzes and tests that I don’t do good on the first time. Even though this may be pointless and corny, this is my apology for being so mean and snarky in my past blog posts. Now let's move to how the week went. Also with all of the cringey stuff since the beginning of even Pre-Calc, it has all been ironic and I’m not actually that cringey just to clarify
Now as this is the week of Halloween it was quite spooky. But we still pushed through and on Monday we went through the quizzes and that it isn’t a quiz we should retakes because its worth so few points. There was nothing else much we did but that was still good
Now on Tuesday we went over implicitly defined functions and needed to find the derivative of y which was really confusing but I think I’m finally getting the hang of which is good and nice. It still is difficult though lmpo, but it’s better than dealing with learning something like this in a huge college class.
On Wednesday we had a well needed work from the lesson assignment assigned tuesday. We also finished up the second part of the lesson which was really cool and informative. And I assume that these lessons will learn into lessons later and make those so much easier. You also gave us some informative blogs that really helped with my understanding of those rules
On Thursday we had another quiz that I know that I failed. I just didn’t understand these things as much as I thought I did. It’s okay though, I’ve pushed my expectations down to a C+ being a really good grade for this class. But the grade isn’t really the point, the point is that I am learning calculus with a teacher who is used to dealing more one on one and teaching a smaller environment rather than a university professor who teaches 400 people seminars.
On Friday we returned to the idea of trig function derivatives with their inverses and that started with a kind of confusing activity, but the lesson was really interesting to learn. And I know that we will have many more interesting lessons ahead of us as a class that I’ll put on my Weebly. But this is the end for right now.
Wow this past week has been so exciting. You remember that test from last week, I figured out that that’s the lowest grade I’ve ever gotten on a test in literally forever which was a cool achievement for me after I stopped freaking out at what my parents would do when they saw it. But that’s okay because we learnt more cool stuff. Like on monday we worked on going through intriguing compositions of functions and other cool guy stuff and learnt about something totally radical called the CHAIN RULE that is just so neat and cool even though I barely understand it. And that quite honestly is just my fault and I’ll probably just ask to go over it later, that tends to help me to be quite honest. But we couldn’t even finish the lesson because there was so much cool stuff to fit into just one day that it would’ve exploded our brains all over the classroom; and I don’t think the janitors would like that.
So on Tuesday we finally slow burned the coolness from the CHAIN RULE we got an amazing assignment that everyone just loved so much and was so amazing. Sadly our coolness reserves were burnt from CHAIN RULE that we couldn’t go on.
With our reserves still growing we did something to help it on both wednesday and thursday, we went mega whiteboarding and took out the big guns to fight with to learn these dastardly concepts and become mathematical masters of matter. And it was really cool too to do the mega whiteboarding activity, but sadly there was no new lessons learnt to us, just another assignment that was really short and good
Now nothing could have prepared us for Friday, which had one of Mr. Cresswells coolest tricks. He had us do a quiz, all cool and normal right, but with NOOOOOO calculatoooooooooorrr which was just so exciting and guess what I figured out. I failed this quiz toooo wow isn’t that so exciting. Anyways I ended this test with another failed quiz and am ready for next week to write my cool blog post. Have a good night Mr. Cresswell and you’ll see another next week wow
Yo Cress. It’s crazy how fast this class goes. After all the excitement and failure of last tri for me there wasn’t a break and we just kept chugging along as we went over not only the product and quotient rules on Monday, but we also went over radically anti-derivatives and they are just so cool and radical. But I can’t stop there because we also got the coolest worksheet for them ever that I didn’t understand even half of lmpo.
And we can’t forget about tuesday, can we, we kept this math train chugging slowly but surely with a work day tuesday that was so productive and I managed to slightly regain my bearings on the whole derivatives thing which was nice
But then we had to shoot out on the rails like a cat seeing a dog after them on wednesday when we went back to geometry with trig functions, BUT CALCULUSIFIED (because we were trying to find derivatives and calculusified came up as an actual word in my google drive so it's fair game) and that was just a total blast to learn and guess what, we got another assignment and omgggg that made me so happy inside that we got another one and we only had to do tangent on one of them which was super neat
And of course, as is necessary after any mathsplosion, we needed to have a slow day just to chillax and whiteboard the assignment, even though I would’ve preferred to do the paper equivalent of waterboarding instead on it because screw international laws. But we did that and all was chill and good for Thursday to prepare us for Friday which was the most exciting day
QUIZ DDAYYYYYYYYY. That’s what Friday was and it was just such a perilous and exciting quiz and I feel like I failed it, I don't know maybe that’s why I sound so passive aggressive right now in this blog post, I probably did really bad on this, and I guess that’s just the way it's going to go. I thought things might have gotten better after that B on the Chapter 2 test, but I guess I’m probably just going to keep on doing terrible on the tests lmpo, I guess so long as I can use these and my assignment for my grades to be afloat it should be mostly okay. But yeah that is all for this week Cress, check back next week for another exciting look into the world of my weekly summaries.
Wow i just have so much to say about this week, but you know what. The first thing I’m going to do is make it real in here, I’m sorry I missed Friday.